What Do You Want to Be...?
“This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you,
who directs you in the way you should go.”
“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Remember when you were a kid and people would ask you that? That question used to drive me crazy because I never knew the answer. I would usually just mumble some lame answer that I had heard someone else say; but not having the answer always left me feeling like I didn't know something I was supposed to know. Everyone else seemed to have their life plan in place, but the truth was, I had no clue what I wanted to be, other than BIG. I wanted to be a grown-up so I could live on my own, buy what I wanted to buy and not have anyone tell me what to do. Even then, my fierce independent streak was at work.
As I grew older, I seemed to follow my heart and gravitate toward whatever plan seemed best at the moment without any plan in mind. Then later, I felt like time was running out and I fell into despair because my career had sort-of evolved out of default rather than any firm plan I had for it. As my relationship with God has progressed, I asked Him time and time again what He wanted me to do. In spite of the sincerity of my heart’s cry...[crickets.] Sometimes I would hear, “Be still and trust me.” The years passed and my relationship with God grew deeper, but I never had any idea what He wanted me to do other than stay close to Him, so I did that, always wondering what else there was in His plan for me.
I will soon be sixty-five years old, and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, but I don’t see that in such a negative light anymore. God has shown me that He just wants me to be available. In fact, He recently told me that one of His favorite things about me is that I am ready, willing and available to do whatever He calls me to do without a preconceived notion of what I want to do. As I have continued to seek His daily guidance, it has brought me into a much closer relationship with Him. It seems the very thing I felt was a failing on my part is exactly the reason He is pleased with me. He told me it is the way He made me, and has nothing to do with any lack on my part. Whew! What a relief!
All I have to do is seek Him every morning and seek His guidance throughout my day. I learned a long time ago that when I try to be in control, things go off the rails quickly, so I am happy to let God take the lead. No planning or worry necessary…just trust and abide in Him. What joy that is because His presence is my favorite place in the world to be!
Prayer: Father God, thank You for Your wisdom, Your daily guidance and Your amazing love for me. Thank you for teaching me to trust You, love You and abide in You. Walking with You is the greatest joy of my life, and Your Divine Presence is the sweetest thing I know. I love You, praise You, trust You, worship You, and rejoice in the privilege of knowing You as my very personal Savior and Friend. I live to bring You all the glory for every good thing that comes from this life You have given me. I am Yours and You are mine. Use me in accordance with Your will and be glorified in my life today, in Jesus’ mighty Name I pray, amen.
“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; He is my God, and I trust him.” Psalm 91:1-2
“Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you.” Psalm 25:5